Tony is currently suffering from depression, and not even the offer of a lunchtime drink and a few of his favourite cheeseburgers can do much to raise his spirits.
He says that it's normal that he's depressed, because when he looks at his life, and what he's achieved, he reckons that his time on earth has been nothing short of a tragedy, and that he feels that he's being persecuted for being a foul-mouthed, obese layabout.
Somebody in the pub said that the church can do wonders for people like Tony, but Tony reckons that religion may be a great healer, but he doubts it can do much for him, considering he's an atheist.
Personally, I've seen him like this before, so I know that in a few days he'll be back to his old self, and bouncing around full of joy, and looking forward to getting drunk at the weekend.
Until then, it's best to leave the fat bastard well and truly alone, and let him wallow in his misery.
So now I'm off to the pub on my own, to enjoy a few pints of strong lager, and then I'm off to my favourite fast food restaurant, for a couple of double cheeseburgers and whatever else my limited budget can pay for.