We had a great time today at the pub, partly because Tony and I drank until we couldn't stand up, and also because we met a couple of young and ready-to-try-anything students, called Carly and Kelly.
The two students told us they came from the west coast of America, and when Tony heard that, I thought he was going to wet himself.
Of course, you might well know that Tony loves all things American, from cheeseburgers to Coke, and Kojak (the original series with Telly Salavas) to Budweiser, so when our two admirers introduced themselves, he was halfway to heaven, thinking about how he was going to educate the delightful Carly (I went for Kelly) in the art of rough sex and beer drinking, back at our flat.
Unfortunately, because of our morning's intake of strong lager and whisky, neither of us were capable of sex on the sofa, and we had a hell of a job even trying to make conversation with the two girls, who kept on repeating that we were the cutest guys that they had ever met in a long time.
Tony wasn't that bothered at the end of the day that a potential fuck had passed him by, because as he said, and indeed as he says quite often, sex is wonderful, but beer, whisky, and cigarettes are just so much better.
I reckon the fat bastard is probably right, but deep down, we're both annoyed that Carly and Kelly slipped out of our grasps without even a hug and a kiss.
Such is life!