Sunday, 25 March 2012

An Ideal Job

As another week of glorious idleness comes into view, Tony and me often think about what we would like to do for a living, if we ever gave up unemployment, and decided to go back to work.
The choices, of course, are endless, but despite the promise of earning big money in the city, flying all over the world as an airline pilot, or thrilling the crowds as a professional footballer, Tony reckons that nothing can be better than working in a pub.
He says that it's the combination of serving beer, engaging in idle chatter, and bringing pleasure to his customers that would make running a pub an ideal job, and allow him to make use of his charming personality, and his natural gift that he says makes him a people person.
Tony did actually once work in a pub - just before he became an professional non-worker - and although he sees himself as pub-manager-of-the-year material, he's probably the last person you'll want to see behind a bar, if you're dying for a drink, and just want a bit of peace and quiet.
Sadly, Tony was fired from the last pub he worked in, because being a hopeless alcoholic, who always likes to have the last word, and doesn't like it when someone tells him that the beer he serves is crap, the people person that he claims to be actually turned out to be a fine example of a short-tempered thug, who likes to grab customers by the throat when they say something that he doesn't really agree with.
Still, Tony says that he's now a different man, and because he's a little wiser, calmer, and less volatile, there's no reason why he can't relaunch his pub career, and bring a little happiness to a pub near you - soon!

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