Sunday, 27 May 2012

The Fattest Man Is About To Get Fatter

A new pizzeria has opened just a few streets away from where we live, and so Tony has decided that tonight we're going to try its pizzas, and see if it's worth adding the pizzeria to our list of favourite places to eat.
For Tony, the opening of a new pizzeria or fast-food restaurant is always a major event, because eating is probably the only that he has any interest in, and is the only thing - apart from drinking vast amounts of lager - that he does well.
My fat friend has always been a lover of the finest crap food money can buy, and when he heard that another pizzeria had opened for business, in our part of the world, I thought that he was going to literally explode with Joy.
Mercifully, he didn't explode, because Tony is my best friend, and I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my days without hearing his vulgar jokes, his constant belching, and his opinion on all subjects known to man.
Anyway, after much contemplation, the Fattest Man In London has decided that tonight he's going to try a Four Seasons Special, which the pizzeria describes as a fusion of Italian hams, mushrooms, red peppers and charcoal-grilled chicken, served on a mouth-watering bed of fine Italian tomato sauce and mozzarella. I've decided to go for the same thing, but with an additional topping of sliced pineapple.
We're now waiting patiently for the hour to arrive, when we'll satisfy our hunger, and decide if the Pizzeria is going to be a regular feature in our lives, or if it should be avoided like dogs with rabies and people who work in insurance.

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