Monday, 17 February 2014
Bad Food & Blood Over Her Top
"Oh, bloody ‘ell, Clare, what have you gone and ordered us?" shrieked Sarah, as blood shot from her steak towards her favourite top. "Look at my bloody top, it’s covered in blood!"
"If you’re not happy, then why don’t you bugger off and find a bloody hamburger restaurant," replied Clare, as she stuffed a chunk of steak into her mouth. "And it may have escaped your attention that it’s almost ten o’clock at night, and that we’re the only people in the bar, and this Godforsaken village. So I reckon we’re lucky to be eating anything at all!"
"Calm down girls," pleaded Deano, as he peered into his plate. "Moaning about a plate of steak and chips is hardly the best way to get this holiday up and running."
"The fries are soggy, the meat is still alive, but the beer is GREAT!" said Phil, trying to bring an end to the argument. "I reckon that we should all raise our glasses to Clare, because without her, we’d all be dying of starvation right now."
"TO CLARE!" shouted Deano and Phil, as Sarah tried hard to rub the blood from her top, completely ignoring the two men.
Sarah isn't keen on the steak, and what's more, her top - cheap and trashy - is now covered in blood. So why doesn't she bugger off to McDonalds and leave the others in peace?
Extract taken from "But Bloody France" - a short, amusing tale about four friends having a terrible time in Normandy.
***And coming soon: Part 2 in the series***
And why not join Dave Cooper and Tony Joy, on holiday in Paris and Bordeaux, where the two friends realise that they should have stayed at home, in London.
This ebook - "Dave Cooper: A French Adventure" is now available from Amazon for Kindle, as are all titles by Luke Ryman