Tuesday, 2 May 2017

Have A Nice Day!


Yep, whether it be from the finest restaurant in town or from a fast food restaurant overloaded with spotty students and screaming kids, food has never been so good.

There's all sorts of wonderful food to suit every budget, and there's all types of restaurants hoping to reel us in, feed us up and then spit us out.

When Bob Geldof and Live Aid sang "Feed The World" all of those years ago, they wanted to bring to our attention the famine which was sweeping across Africa like a tsunami. More than thirty years later, the black continent is still begging for food and bothering us with their hideous lack of personal hygiene and their mud huts.

You could throw billions of pounds at the starving masses for the next hundred years, and it wouldn't change a thing!

Lazy isn't the word to describe these idle bastards, who sit around all day making their numerous wives pregnant whilst before watching the day go by from the comfort of their hovels. Work is just a four-letter word to the blacks of deepest Africa, who feel that their problems are because of our lack of care and understanding.

And if you don't believe me, put me to the test.

I mean, go out now, grab a cheeseburger, wrap it up and airmail it to a famine-ridden, African country of your choice.

The recipient of this magnificent gift will no doubt complain that it's gone cold in the post, there's no fries and there's certainly not enough to feed his six wives and forty-three children. But because he's polite, he'll devour the burger in one go before throwing its carton container on the ground, leaving the flies to lick away the cheese and salad which our hungry friend didn't want.

Do not expect a thank-you letter in the post.

Charity, as they say, begins at home. And as they also say, you can help some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time.


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